Complain Train - Kiss My Caboose
So I've been on the complain train lately, with my latest post about how the Spork is gettin no love. Well come on ride it, c'mon ride the train. Today I'm going to talk about someone who has fallen off the face of the earth, but never deserved to be on it in the first place. I hope he ended on the ass of the earth in fact, and by the look of it, his face may very well be the ass of the earth.
I'm talking about Mickey Fucking Avalon. I mean, for fuck's sake... I don't even know what to say. I've heard multiple women talk about this guy being hot, and it's kind of gross. I mean, here:
If ingrown hairs and body and face acne turn you on, I guess I can see it... But if you ask me that's just fucking nasty.
I mean, if you can genuinely be turned on by the thought of looking down between your legs and seeing this guy down there, well congratulations. You probably already had crabs and the clap, now you have Herpes too. But that probably also turns you on.
Hi, I'm "Domestic Abuse Raggedy Anne" and I want to give you an STD cocktail!
On top of that, he has a song called "My Dick"... I won't go into anymore detail than to say the lyrics of the song are about -10% true. I remember seeing this Boost mobile commercial with some real hip-hop artists in it - Jermaine Dupri and Young Jeezy, and then all of the sudden they bring in Mickey Fucking Avalon as if he fits the gangster rapper mold. To top it off, he looks gayer and more non-hip-hop than anyone ever could have made him look if they were actually trying. It was really something else. Here's the video:
Oh, hold on someone is knocking at the door.
(Hello Satan... oh sorry Mickey... I... thought you were someone else)
Hey guys, look... I gotta go. There's someone at the door and he's mad. He's also wearing makeup, smells of B.O., has dirty long red hair, has no shirt on to hide his feminine torso, and is wearing tight jeans sagged down to his worm. I'll catch up with you guys later.
I'm talking about Mickey Fucking Avalon. I mean, for fuck's sake... I don't even know what to say. I've heard multiple women talk about this guy being hot, and it's kind of gross. I mean, here:
If ingrown hairs and body and face acne turn you on, I guess I can see it... But if you ask me that's just fucking nasty.
I mean, if you can genuinely be turned on by the thought of looking down between your legs and seeing this guy down there, well congratulations. You probably already had crabs and the clap, now you have Herpes too. But that probably also turns you on.
Hi, I'm "Domestic Abuse Raggedy Anne" and I want to give you an STD cocktail!
On top of that, he has a song called "My Dick"... I won't go into anymore detail than to say the lyrics of the song are about -10% true. I remember seeing this Boost mobile commercial with some real hip-hop artists in it - Jermaine Dupri and Young Jeezy, and then all of the sudden they bring in Mickey Fucking Avalon as if he fits the gangster rapper mold. To top it off, he looks gayer and more non-hip-hop than anyone ever could have made him look if they were actually trying. It was really something else. Here's the video:
Oh, hold on someone is knocking at the door.
(Hello Satan... oh sorry Mickey... I... thought you were someone else)
Hey guys, look... I gotta go. There's someone at the door and he's mad. He's also wearing makeup, smells of B.O., has dirty long red hair, has no shirt on to hide his feminine torso, and is wearing tight jeans sagged down to his worm. I'll catch up with you guys later.
posted by The Nak at 10:34 PM
1 Comments:
He has a few great songs. "My Dick" being the least blog worthy of them all.. it really does suck, but I guess you WOULD write about that song because you can never utter those words..
and thus my point is made.
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